A friend of mine used to do this send up of NLP.
“Look into my eyes, look into my eyes,
think of puppies,
now think of your problem,
think of puppies,
now think of your problem!”
We used to have some fierce arguments. NLP was manipulative. Hypnosis was wrong. Even worse it was trite and shallow. How could something so facile be so powerful.
But you’re doing it all the time I would fight back, just calling it something different. Communication is Hypnosis. We’re influencing and affecting people all the time, wouldn’t it make sense for all of us to understand how thinking works, how language works so we could use it more effectively?
Let’s say he touched a nerve. I knew I had to find the difference that made a difference between getting it wrong and getting it right.
One of the things I like about the change work I do with people and the chances I get to facilitate group work is that it is a performance and I still get to act. I get to rehearse and re- direct and refine my own game.
NLP is a close contact sport and like in any sport, art or craft you have to be in the right state to achieve excellent performance.
You have to have a clear intention, a goal in mind.
You have to be breathing right so you’re feeding your body oxygen.
You have to have a physiology that will support
The state of mind and body you need to be in
and you need a structure, a pattern for your behaviour on the way to the goal.
When you’ve practiced something enough you reach the stage where you just have to set your intention and you’re wired straight into the state you need for the patterns to fly out without any conscious interference. That’s where the magic lies.
But there’s a ton of difference between knowledge and knowing. You might understand the rules of football but that doesn’t mean you can play. And reading about something on the page isn’t going to get it hard wired into your brain so that it’s available spontaneously just at the right moment.
The pay off for rehearsal, for drilling something so much it becomes an unconscious response is that in the moment of performance you can be watching and listening closely on the outside to whats going on.
Did you know that you can read someone’s pulse
from the carotid artery in the neck?
Have you noticed yet that people move their eyes
in consistent patterns when they think?
Or that when people think in pictures
they breath faster and into their chest more?
Did you ever hear some one say “Yes”
but sound like they meant “No”?
Have you ever been with someone who was tapping their foot, or doing some kind of repetitive action? How did that make you feel?
Do you realise that having access to this class of information
gives you a lot more choices about how you respond?
What ever it is that you excel at or want to excel at. Practice is only every going to make it easier. What skills are you sharpening this week?
Serve your gift and remember,
It ain’t what you do its the way that you do it,
Thats what gets results.